Thursday, October 18, 2012

Dresser's Remorse: The Bad, the Bad and the Ugly

Right at this very moment, I am living in dread as I am having dresser’s remorse.

This morning, I had a 7am dermatologist’s appointment. Now don’t get me wrong, I love that my doctor’s office will see me so early in the morn. However, typically, I lay out my outfit and pack for work the night prior to my early wake-up call.

As you can probably imagine where this is going, I did not take the time to style myself in advance and am now having what I think is worse than a bad hair day – wait for it – a bad outfit day.

At least with a bad hair day, you can always swoop your lack-luster locks up in a pony or – if you are not in a professional setting – a hat works just fine to keep those frizzes under control but, with a bad and ugly outfit, well there is just no getting around it.

I knew I was in trouble when it was 6:55am and I was still at home deep in the bowels of my closet. My dilemma stemmed from the fact that the Santa Ana winds have rolled into Los Angeles and we are having unseasonable warm weather. Yet, when I arrive to my office, the air conditioning is running full blast by the drones that control our automated HVAC system in our building.

I thought a long flowing skirt layered with a tank and a cropped sweater would be perfect solution. Actually, I think it could be the perfect outfit but just not the particular garments that I am currently wearing all together.

With three minutes to get to my appointment, I threw a few other tops into my purse and I was out the door.

I knew I was in trouble when I got out of my car at the doctor’s office and realized that I had even had the audacity to buckle the cutest teal-colored skinny belt with suede tassels around my sloppy waist.No offense to the belt because it is “the” cutest when worn solo, but I had about 4 trends going on at one time and it was not pretty.

On my drive into work, I still hadn’t given up hope. I figured that I could probably save my outfit once I arrived at the office since I had a few options in my purse. So you can imagine my disappointment while, in the ladies room, I realized that Plan B and C were worse than what I was actually wearing.

Suddenly, I was like a cornered animal in the bathroom. I racked my brain: What could I do to get out of this dilemma? Short of chewing off my paw…arm…belt, I thought that perhaps I could tell my boss that I left an important document at home and needed to dash 40 minutes each way to change outfits.

Even he would probably recognize the outfit change and might think I was fickle and shallow.

Then a light bulb went off in my head: an early lunch and a quick dash to Nordstrom rack.

Once again, I would probably be called out by co-workers because my tangerine colored cropped sweater is pret-ty loud and, once again, I would have to explain myself (fickle and shallow) and my dressing quandary. How embarrassing? Most folks at my office just would not get me on this one.

This three time “Best Dressed” winner at my former office resolved to just wo-man up and suffer through the day as is.So in my darkest hour, I looked to my favorite fictional heroine Scarlett O’Hara who said, while wearing drapes I might add, “After all tomorrow is another day.”

Let’s just hope the fashion police don’t find me before then, if so, I might find myself “Worst Dressed” in the pokey.

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